Out!

My roommate John's table draw is very tough, with Full Tilt sponsored pro Gavin Smith and 1996 World Champion Dan Harrington. ESPN selected it to be the secondary feature table, and John is getting cold-called by agents with endorsement offers. I'm very happy for him and he's excited and a little nervous. He's got a huge stack of chips and plenty of room to maneouver; he should be very dangerous.

I felt great once the cards were in the air but couldn't ever get it going today and was always the shortest stack at my table. Felt like a spectator while the rest of them played huge pots, nearly all of them with over 100,000 in chips in them. I was forced to make a move while I still had enough chips and a good reputation and went in with Q 8 of spades. Everyone folded, but the big blind woke up with two Jacks. I hit an eight but it wasn't enough.

Five seconds after I busted I felt an extreme weariness and incipient headache. Suddenly reduced from hopeful participant to spectator, I head over to watch John. He's miked up at a fancy table on a dias with really cool blue lighting, ESPN cameras all around, and plenty of space and spectator seats. I'm very, very happy with him, and the 3% of any win he comes up with more than makes up for any envy I feel.

I'm feeling a bit discouraged when John and Gavin Smith both totally misplay a hand where John has Aces. Somehow that reassures me that what I lacked this year wasn't so much strategy, but cards. As poker players we strive for perfection, and it's probably theoretically possible for anyone to win the tournament, but we are all so far from perfect play that even the best pros don't stand much more of a chance than I do.

John's finally moved from the feature table, pocketing a minimum $5000 for sitting there for an hour. I hope they show him on TV, but I'm not sure he'll make it. I can't see him at his new table, and layer after layer of weariness is settling in on me. I bolt for the hotel and pack for the airport, once again leaving in a mad rush to try to make the 5:35 for home.

I'm on standby and just about to board the flight when the last passenger sprints up to take it from me at the last minute. This feels like another bad beat!

Somehow or other my spirits are still pretty high as I write this last blog post. One of my poker friends gave me a little pain pill and this seems like exactly the right occasion for it. I am starting to come down, but I've still got a very, very long way to go.

Right now it feels like I can take some of the fantastic energy I've felt and expended and put it to good use in my life back home. There's certainly plenty of room for improvement on a lot of fronts! Still, looking into the future a little, I'm sure I'll spend most of the next few days compulsively checking the tournament status and following John's progress.

As I write this they only have to lose about 60 more players before they're all in the money. John's the chip leader at his table, in his element, picking on the short and especially the medium stacks, as no one wants to bust out of the tournament at this point. I'd give almost anything in the world to be there, but I guess it just wasn't meant to be this year. No surprise, that's how tournaments almost always end. Now remind me again, why do have my heart set on playing this every year?

Thanks for following along with me. I hope you've had some fun and felt like you were there with me.

Until next year,

Luckyscum