The Seniors tournament

Old guys get no respect at the World Series of Poker, and for the most part they don’t deserve much. The stereotype is that they play extremely tight, nitty game and completely disintegrate mentally halfway through a long day. Normally, if I see an old guy at my tournament table, I'm expecting him to get culled from the herd pretty quickly. Of course, now that I'm older I'm sure that's what they all think when the look at me.

I am 54 and I now need glasses to be sure what my cards are. (I’m 95% sure without them, but that’s nowhere near good enough. Also, they look better, stronger, and more inviting when the marks are larger.) My hair’s a little grayer, and I use a lumbar support pad for my back. And yes, I get pretty tired at the end of a long day. But the stereotype of old guys is so pervasive that it presents an opportunity: if they assume you are really tight, play like a maniac and watch them all fold. This works particularly well in a tournament setting when you are playing with complete strangers and change tables frequently. I’ve even seriously considered dyeing my hair white to look older.

Today, though, we're playing the Seniors event and everyone is over 50. I played in it for the first time last year and was shocked at what a weak field it was. This year the guy to my right tells me before we start that he looks forward to this all year long. He gets the whole table to autograph is receipt and tells us that last year he wore the colored wristband you get so they know you're a player for three weeks. He obviously doesn't realize it, but he's given away a perfect roadmap for how to play against him: put him to a quick test for all of his chips and unless he's holding something super strong he's going to throw it away automatically.

I get virtually no cards for nine hours but survive by robbing them to death. But the worst part is listening to their stories. Am I going to be that boring at the poker table some day?

Finally, I get low on chips yet again only this time I run into a real hand. Adios, viejos! Hasta la proxima vez!